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I killed him !!!

May 30, 2008

Yes, I had to do it. I would have spared him if I had a choice.

It all began on a very hot and sultry night; about three weeks back. I was trying to catch up some sleep that day, inspite of the heat when all of a sudden, I started hearing a wierd noise. A noise which was like piercing a thousand spears right into my eardrum. I tried to figure it out where it came from but was in vain. This happened all the following nights and one day I actually got to see him. Unfortunately, I didnt have the energy to approach him at that time and to my bad luck, he never appeared in front of me since then. He kept driving me nuts each day. If only he had the guts to do, whatever that he does, in front of me! Why me, why does he have to torture me of all people and even if he wanted to, why doesnt he pick up someone of his own size? All these thoughts kept coming, on and forth, in my mind. My search began for the answers and it seems, this is what he does to attract females. One hell of an annoying pervert; showing off at the expense of my sleep ! Thats it. I couldnt hold it any longer.

I kept waiting for a right opportunity to finish him once and for all. The day-May 30th, at 3 in the morning, when he usually gets busy with his showing off activities, I started searching for him. Somehow, he knew of my plans and began to make his moves. He fled, I chased and it continued for a while. The place slowly started becoming a mess, furnitures were moved here and there. I wasnt bothered at all. My only aim was to eliminate him. His pleading never reached my ears, and as if I cared! He must have realised his mistake and must have also knew that his end wasnt too far. He stopped moving and I finally managed to corner him. I moved towards him with my swollen eyes. I had been deprived of sleep for the last two weeks and there he is, in front of me, the reason for my zombie look. Only then it clicked me that in my anxiety to finish him, I forgot to get hold of any kind of weapon. Cant kill him with my hands; it was next to impossible and moreover, I didnt want any kind of stain on my body. I slowly retreated with the fear that he might escape once again and this time for good. Well, to my surprise, he did not move at all till I got what I wanted. Perhaps, he was too tired and was waiting for his death. He stood still as if everything was over. Now, I felt bad for him and thought of forgiving him. I decided to give him another chance and to take up the issue with him later during the day. But wait, he started moving. He scared me by moving frantically in circles. What a mind reader! I realised, this could probably be his way of striking an attack; an attack all of a sudden!!! He leaped towards me with his full vigour, I took out my weapon and fired at him; all at the same time(it would have been a great slow motion sequence in a movie). Eveything happened at the blink of an eyelid. Phoooooooooooooosh!

He fell on the floor with a last minute struggle for life. I had no regrets. I decided to let him go, but he provocated me. I had to suffocate him to death. I could not sleep after that too. It was not because of the guilt. His death happened to be in my room and his spirit could be still roaming around, who knows; it was not a natural death, right? I blocked all possible ways for his family to come and visit, what if they wanted to take a revenge on me. I buried him the same day in the nearby compound so that none of the scavangers can approach him.

It was just today that I came to know his identity. They call him Linnaeus a.k.a. Achetus Domesticus and he hails from the Gryllidae family.
May his soul rest in peace !!!

Update : Earlier titled — “I am a murderer!” .The clarification is available in a post after this.

13 Comments leave one →
  1. soneeta permalink
    May 31, 2008 6:46 am

    hey….congrats.u successfully killed a cockroach.i never knew u r so bold and strong.i am proud of ur courage.and i need a help from u.i have got an is a little stronger than whom u killed bt i m sure u will be able to defet him.people call him Lacertillia.let me know when u r free.i will let u the place and time…
    good luck πŸ˜‰

  2. Anonymous permalink
    May 31, 2008 1:13 pm

    Well Done… Kudos… Finally U managed to do it…..hahahah…. U certainly Deserve a chance to write a thrilling murder movie’s screenplay….If I am Not wrong Achetus Domesticus is more commonly known as Cricket….!!!

  3. rakesh permalink
    May 31, 2008 2:04 pm

    Dude,u r officially a member of the CricketBusters!!!
    Keep busting!

    If there’s something strange in your neighborhood
    Who you gonna call?
    If there’s something weird and it don’t look good
    Who you gonna call?
    I ain’t afraid of no Cricket
    I ain’t afraid of no Cricket
    If you’re seeing things running through your head
    Who can you call?
    An invisible Cricket sleeping in your bed
    Oh, who you gonna call?
    I ain’t afraid of no Cricket
    I ain’t afraid of no Cricket
    Who you gonna call?
    If you’re all alone, pick up the phone
    And call
    I ain’t afraid of no Cricket
    I hear it likes the girls
    I ain’t afraid of no Cricket
    Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
    Who you gonna call?
    If you’ve had a dose of a freaky Cricket
    You’d better call
    Let me tell you something
    Bustin’ makes me feel good
    I ain’t afraid of no Cricket
    I ain’t afraid of no Cricket

  4. meeranirmal permalink
    June 1, 2008 9:12 am

    Thanks………………. If U hadn’t done this…I wud have been his killer…!

  5. Poonam Sharma permalink
    June 3, 2008 9:51 am

    You sadistic murderer πŸ™‚

    What a detailed How-to you have written! Count yourself lucky Indian Penal Code has nohing for this πŸ˜›

  6. vimmuuu permalink
    June 3, 2008 6:30 pm

    @soneeta :
    I didnt kill a cockroach !!and how is a Lacertilia distubring you. Poor creatures !! πŸ™‚

    @anonymous :
    Thank you. and yes finally!!!

    @rakesh :
    Are you a part of the lyrics-plagiarism team? Ghost buster team is going to sue you for lifting this.

    @meera :
    What!!! Is that what you do? you too a murderer?

    @poonam :
    Now shhhh. Dont let this piece of information leak. One of my friend said when the ‘real’ cops search for some murder related issues on the net, they would find this article and I would land in trouble πŸ™‚

  7. December 10, 2009 2:59 pm

    You cruel killer…You boys can play cricket and can fight to get the remote when cricket is going on but you can’t allow an insect with the same name to be with you..????huh!! πŸ™‚

    • December 10, 2009 10:32 pm

      LOL, dont include me in that cricket playing. Sports and me are like books and me !!! πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ I dont play or watch sports !!! πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

  8. December 10, 2009 5:37 pm

    I am reminded of the scene, where Rajnikanth tries to kill a cockroach !!!!! ROFL πŸ˜† I visualised you in the whole scene…ROFL… πŸ˜†

    • December 10, 2009 10:33 pm

      LOL, I do remember that scene, any idea which movie it was !! ROFL it was !!! πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

      • December 11, 2009 11:17 am

        I think its the movie where Rajinikanth does double role – one the absent minded professor, who gets killed. The other is a street don, who will finally be enlightened by the Professor’s brother (Prabhu) and GF (Suhasini) !!!! Is is Athisaya Piravi ?????

  9. Savitha permalink
    December 10, 2009 7:31 pm

    You murdered??Took a life?? What grave crime?? πŸ˜›

    Humorous post! Enjoyed!!

    • December 10, 2009 10:33 pm

      I know, Im feeling bad for that !! πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

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