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When I underwent Sex Change – Part 1

June 3, 2009

This was the only thing left for me to do and here it is !!

Solilolilol tagged me to list down 5 crushes of mine if I were a girl / woman / lady. Now to understand what a woman needs or wants, I have to be one. So for this tag, just for this tag, I am undergoing sex change.


This is how it all happened :

Solilo, a blogger-cum-scientist, had invented a sex change machine, which she named Switcheroo and had invited OG, Dhiren, me and a few other bloggers to test it. Apparently, she wants to conduct a research on the kind of crushes men and women have. We are then supposed to publish our experiences as a post in our respective blogs. The research results would be used for……aahhhhh, I don’t know !

We were made to sit outside while the tests were being conducted on the bloggers in the lab. My turn came up and I entered the room. All I had to do was to lie down on a couch inside the machine and wear the necessary outfits required so that you know…..you know…… !!

Inside the machine it was written, “The transformation takes approximately 20 mins, depending on Ahem!! Ahem !! Once it happens, you would not be aware of your previous gender. You would be a totally different person. Keep your outfits ready and please no drinks or makeup allowed”.

Solilo asked me to say when I was ready. I nodded my head in consent and she immediately pressed a button. Pooooooooooooooooffffffffffffff !!!

After 10 mins…………

Ppppttttt…bbbbrrr…pttttt…ptttt…..bdddddmmmm….chishhhh. The machine stopped.

Voice from inside the machine : Over ?????

Solilo : I am afraid not Vimal, errr..whatever you are. I forgot, its 3pm and we have power cut / load shedding here at this time. I am really sorry. Please stay inside the machine; you are neither here nor there now. I hope you understand !!

Whatever : Whaaat ??? Oh my goodness ! Am I a transgender??? SOLILO, get me back to ‘either this or that’ right now and I hope YOU understand what I am saying !!!

Solilo : Sure. Sure. But we will have to wait for an hour for the power to restore.

Whatever (with wide open eyes) : Until then???

Solilo thinking to herself , “ Ahaaa ! This is the first time we have a transgender. Let me listen to their version also. This would help my survey. Buhahahhahaha” !!

Solilo (with a gleam in her eyes) : Hmm…maybe, you could come up with your 5 crushes. We could save a lot of time and when the power comes back, you could be yourself sooner. What say?

Whatever : Ok. Can I take any of the bloggers name? (asking innocently)

Solilo : Nooooooooooo. Not now. We will see how this goes first !!!

Whatever : Oh….ok ! Here goes :

(( Solilo takes her notepad and starts writing.
Title “5 Crushes of a Transgender” ))

1 ) Shah Rukh Khan :

Honestly, I never liked the earlier SRK. He used to hit men and women in all his earlier movies. I started liking him after DDLJ and he has become my role model ever since he did that gag with Saif in KHNH. Six packs or family packs, he is the best !!

2 ) Mimoh Chakraborthy :

I saw his Jimmy five times, you knowww !! What a star ! His hair reminds me of Weirdo, my dog that died at a very young age.

3) Karan Johar :

Do I need to give any explanation?

They both look sooo cute together, na?

4) Rakhi Sawant :

I use to have high regards for her. But ever since she did that matrimonial publicity stunt, I am thinking otherwise. Only men were allowed to be a part of it. Hypocrite that she is !!!

Solilo interrupting : Wait ! Wait ! Wait ! Atleast one non film celebrity please !!

5) Hmmm…..Varun Gandhi :

Isnt he beautiful? Oh, you should listen to him speak !!! Just like one of us !!!

To be continued……….(obviously!!)

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53 Comments leave one →
  1. Bartzenegger permalink
    June 4, 2009 12:30 am

    OH i see..so now u r stuck somewhere between vimal and vimala??

    I hope the effects aren't Irreversible & I hope u get well soon!! buahahha

  2. Ordinary Guy permalink
    June 4, 2009 1:45 am

    Aliyaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

    classic machu!!!!

    this is one of your best!!!!!!!
    LOL…….. yeah, karan johar and SRK do come in this list!!!! most definately……
    awesomely done!!!!
    now, waiting for sololi's comments 😛

  3. Ordinary Guy permalink
    June 4, 2009 1:47 am

    you should have also included farhan akhtar in this list 😛

  4. Reema permalink
    June 4, 2009 3:11 am

    LOL 😀 btw which blogger were u going to name as a transgender? I can guess the first name!! 😛

  5. Solilo permalink
    June 4, 2009 4:26 am

    Oha..ha.aha..ha.ha..ha..a gosh! I laughed for good 10 mins. Still laughing.

    Now from Don you have made me a mad Scientist ala ‘Back to the future’.

    Everyone totally forgot this side of the tag.

    “Please stay inside the machine; you are neither here nor there now. I hope you understand !!”

    Ha…ha…ha.. and you understood immediately.

    I can’t see the first one. I IGNORE 😉

    MimoH…Mithun Da must be cursing the day when he made this masterpiece.

    Last one takes the cake and icing and oven. :))))))

    Vimmu, this is the best. You came up with this in just couple of hours. WOW!

    Why part -1? More to come? :))))

    *dagger shot at the one who wanted to see farhan akhtar in this list*

  6. Ashwathy permalink
    June 4, 2009 5:35 am

    "Solilolilol"
    "Switcheroo"
    "Whatever"
    LOL!!!! 😀 i dont know from where u come up with these!

    and u made Solilo laugh your trademark scary laughter buahahah!!

    taking any of the bloggers name "innocently"???? and u say i m trying to innocentify myself?? shame u on!!! 😛

    the list is howlarious – esp the last choice! waiting eagerly for the next part!!

    P.S.: whatever u do, please dont put this URL along with ur matrimonial profile. annathode kalyana yogam mudangum!!!!

  7. Ashwathy permalink
    June 4, 2009 5:36 am

    P.S.: the next part IS that of a woman's mind rite?? or wud u b inventing a fourth gender??? considering u, that wont be impossible either 😛 hehehe

  8. santasizing...Fantasizing permalink
    June 4, 2009 5:45 am

    Geeeeeeeeeeeez….waiting for the second half:D
    when is that happening???

  9. hitchwriter permalink
    June 4, 2009 6:11 am

    OMG OMG

    good god !!!

    now that i have gone through the machine… !! lol…

    that was fantastic !!!! Swicherooo tag !!! classical !!!

    I just couldnt stop ROFLOLING !!!

  10. hitchwriter permalink
    June 4, 2009 6:20 am

    dude you need to get some comment threading software here.. or shift to word press !! think about it !! 😀

  11. oorjas permalink
    June 4, 2009 6:24 am

    now this is something totally unexpected.. only your brain could have worked this way..

    the choices you have made are right on spot.

    SRK & KJ look so cute together..

    and Mimoh OMG…

    classic Varun & Rakhi….

    btw which blogger are we talking about..?

  12. Nautankey permalink
    June 4, 2009 6:36 am

    Wat a post and mimo rocks!!! Seriously I think he resemble u a bit,you maaney vimal the guy 😀

  13. Ramya permalink
    June 4, 2009 6:47 am

    Ellarum koodi ende ettane ingane akiyallo….Bhagawaane!!!!
    (loud wailing accompanied by forehead and chest beating)

    Psst….BTW Vimal chetta can you please return my red skirt and my pink lipstick please…

  14. June 4, 2009 7:01 am

    dear me!! one hr over? u back to vimal/vimala yet? 😛

  15. indyeahforever permalink
    June 4, 2009 8:29 am

    ROFL!!!
    Vimal ya Vimala?
    that is soo hilarious!

    ROFL!!!!!!!

    another part coming up?
    Solilo has no clue what a monster she has unleashed… :D:D

    SRK?rofl!!
    *Solilo ready with a dagger*
    halpp!!

    all the choices are darn good Vimal/Vimala :D:D

    let me read again and laugh some more 😀

  16. Ashwathy permalink
    June 4, 2009 8:46 am

    ROFL @ Ramya

    I was waiting and wondering if u'd come here too!! 😀
    oru aniyathiyude swapnangal ellam thakarthu ee ettan!! hahaha…

  17. Veena Chech permalink
    June 4, 2009 9:08 am

    Hmm..now I understand why u made this remark on previous posts reply
    " See, I made fun of both the genders !!!" :)..hehehe..
    BTW, is this the reason for not getting in touch whilst u were here in UK?? :)..hehehe..Nice post, waiting for the next part..

  18. Rakesh Vanamali permalink
    June 4, 2009 9:20 am

    Lol! Vimmuuu, whatever happened to you that you thought of something like this? :)))

    What are you now? 🙂

  19. Rakesh Vanamali permalink
    June 4, 2009 9:21 am

    Ende ponnu mone, kalyanam aduthu varumbol, inganethe palathum chindhikalle!!! :)))

  20. Rakesh Vanamali permalink
    June 4, 2009 9:21 am

    HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA…… just to rub it in!

  21. sonee permalink
    June 4, 2009 9:39 am

    OMG…
    HOW DID U COME UP WITH THAT.
    good one…while the rest four were obvious VARUN GANDHI was the best choise.
    …n y dont u put a foto whr u look beautiful…you know!!…

  22. Kislay permalink
    June 4, 2009 10:09 am

    Awesome list . If only I had thought of VG , I came up with RG instead . It suggests that the feminine me in attracted to power while the feminine you is attracted to Passion ( passionate speakers ) . 😉 And inclusion of Rakhi Sawant was pure genius . Kick ass mate .

  23. Smitha permalink
    June 4, 2009 10:44 am

    Vimmmuuu!!! that was the bestest!!! ROFL!! Can't stop laughing!!! Trust you to come up with something like this 🙂

    And you made sure SRK is there too 🙂

    Rakhi Sawant!!! She is looks perfect for the part 🙂

    Waiting with bated breadth for the next part!!!

  24. Viviiiiii permalink
    June 4, 2009 2:01 pm

    LOL

    Good one Vim"ali"

    Liked it .. lookin forward to the next part

  25. Anu Russell permalink
    June 4, 2009 3:49 pm

    that made me laugh…thanks 🙂 so funny!

  26. Smita permalink
    June 4, 2009 6:35 pm

    Hi Mr Err Miss Errr whatever!!!!

    I am so so glad that u included SRK in here…am sure u must have fallen in love with his Pakoda nose!!! And am sure u dream of him calling you VivvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvMal!!!! 😀

    And I thank you from the bottom of my heart for including Mimoh & Varun uncles….koi unhe choose hi nahin karta!!! But u did it 😀

    ~~~~~~

    What A laugh riot this piece is. If a vacation & few days away from blogging can do this to you then please stay away from it always (I heave a anticipatory sigh of relief ;-))

  27. amit permalink
    June 4, 2009 8:54 pm

    Crazy guy!
    What the hell! Hahahaha!
    Solilo will kill you! You have raped the tag! LOL!

  28. vimmuuu permalink
    June 4, 2009 9:46 pm

    @ Rakesh :

    Thats a stupid name and I would be glad if you replaced the first letter with 'F' !

    I will be back !

    @ OG :

    Waiting for your version buddy. and Farhan, even I think is good. But since someone ordered me to include, I should do it, na?

    @ Reema :

    LOL. Who is it? No, No, dont reveal it here. 😀

    @ Solilo :

    I need to be back in 'shape', na? Thanks, this idea came up in an hours time. I was confused as to what to write !

    @ Ashwathy :

    Put this with my matrimonial. Are you kidding me? LOL. Already Im destined as a woman repeller ! and this post. LOL.

    @ Richa :

    LOL. Soon.

  29. vimmuuu permalink
    June 4, 2009 9:46 pm

    @ Dhiren :

    I know. I have been thinking of a shift for a very long time now.

    @ Oorjas :

    Y, you didnt like Mimoh? and Blogger Who ? 😉

    @ Nautankey :

    Mimoh looks like me??? You devil!!!

    @ Ramya :

    LOL, I will be back sis.

    Btw, those lipsticks and skirts were not for me. Your hubby wanted them for some kinda play and he was too shy or afraid to ask you directly. You can collect it from him.

  30. vimmuuu permalink
    June 4, 2009 9:47 pm

    @ AV :

    I donno. Im still somewhere in between.

    @ Indyeah :

    Another part should come up, na? Atleast I want to see the normal me.LOL. You wanna read the torture again and again??? Gutsy girl !

    @ Veena chechi :

    LOL. See, Im always careful ! and LOL, this happened after I got back here !

    @ Rakesh 2 :

    LOL. I was fine. Blogging ruined me !!! 😀

    and no kalyanam as of now. adinulla yogam illaanna thonnaney 😀

  31. vimmuuu permalink
    June 4, 2009 9:47 pm

    @ Sonee :

    Everyone hates Varun Gandhi. LOL. What do you mean my beautiful snap??? LOL

    @ Kislay :

    Welcome to V-Lokam and thanks for dropping in your comments.

    While my list inst feminine buddy. Its that somewhere in between list. LOL. Yet to check your list and Im on my way.

    @ Smitha 2 :

    Heyy, I was just following the rules by adding Shah Rukh in the list. LOL.

    @ Vivek :

    LOL @ Vim-ali !!! That was funny !

  32. vimmuuu permalink
    June 4, 2009 9:47 pm

    @ Anu :

    Im glad I did that !

    @ Smita :

    LOL. I know, they are ignored and neglected always. There should be some gender who would fall for them, na? 😀

    "If a vacation & few days away from blogging can do this to you then please stay away from it always" — That is some encouragement buddy !!

    @ Amit :

    LOL. I raped the tag ???? That was already a raped tag in all sense !!

  33. Smita permalink
    June 5, 2009 3:23 am

    Oh! That i always am. Encouraging to my enthusiastic friends.

  34. Sakhi permalink
    June 5, 2009 5:51 am

    haa..ha… ha… that was a great way to handle the tag!! Hilarious 😀 😀

  35. kanagu permalink
    June 5, 2009 5:54 pm

    LOL bro 🙂 cant stop laughing… Don's idea backfired 🙂 now what she going to do.. make sure you are still inside the machine and get out you back to normal 🙂

  36. writerzblock permalink
    June 5, 2009 6:29 pm

    Woooow!! What a blast of a reply to that tag. Brilliant. And I am so glad you thought of Varun …he does deserve some attention, considering everyone else is focussed on Rahul baba.

  37. Badz permalink
    June 5, 2009 7:23 pm

    Vimmuuu. Badz on her best behaviour. Not going to tease you. 😐

    That post was too good though. Couldn't stop laughing. 😉

    Hat off to you guys. You have a wicked sense of humour. 😉 😛

    Can't be any nicer now. 😛
    So waiting for part 2. 😉

  38. vimmuuu permalink
    June 5, 2009 9:09 pm

    @ Smita :

    LOL ! I shouldnt have said that !!

    @ Sakhi :

    😀

    @ Kanagu :

    LOL, Im stuck dude. Its in the second part.

    @ Writerzblock :

    Welcome to V-Lokam and thanks for dropping in your comment.

    LOL, Jai Varun ji ki. I just hope this doesnt come under the notice of any BJP guy !

    @ Badz:

    What took you so long to come here ? LOL. The second part is up already ! 😀

  39. partywithneha permalink
    June 6, 2009 7:54 am

    Whoa! haha…loved what u made of the tag.
    I ignore #1 too.but totally applaud u on #5!
    And who said Farhan Akhtar should be on THIS list?? Are u crazy?

  40. Vee permalink
    June 6, 2009 11:42 am

    That was hilarious, but no come on, seriously… give me 5 really deserving ones..

    and whats with that Rakhi thingy… She is still good and I still admire her..

  41. vimmuuu permalink
    June 6, 2009 1:26 pm

    @ Neha :

    Welcome to V-Lokam and thanks for dropping in your comment.

    Hate him or love him, you cant ignore SRK !! Sigh !!!

    @ Vee :

    I knew you would have a problem with the Rakhi thing !! LOL !! Dude, shes turned crazy !!!

  42. Just call me 'A' permalink
    June 7, 2009 8:21 am

    This is hilarious and a splendid twist to Solilo's tag. I could not stop laughing. will visit again 🙂

  43. vimmuuu permalink
    June 7, 2009 9:20 pm

    @ A :

    Welcome to V-Lokam and thanks for dropping in your comment.

    Me becoming a transgender or a pregnant woman is hilarious for you???? LOL !!! Yeah, I know I know !!

    So I should call you just A ? U mean, just A ?? 😀

  44. eye-in-sty-in permalink
    June 7, 2009 10:35 pm

    This was a riot!

    Best was the KJ one … fundu tagline for it 🙂

  45. vimmuuu permalink
    June 9, 2009 9:21 am

    @ EISI :

    LOL.

  46. indiapavan permalink
    June 11, 2009 9:44 am

    Bravo! Very nice and imaginitive to do a tag. 🙂 Kudos! 😛

  47. indiapavan permalink
    June 11, 2009 9:48 am

    *Imaginative WAY to do a tag

  48. Shiwuz permalink
    July 9, 2009 4:02 pm

    Lol… this is the first time I am reading your work, thanks to Ashwathy's post… And need I say – you are HILARIOUS! I am still to read Part 2, but couldn't wait to comment!

    • December 10, 2009 10:35 pm

      Welcome to V-Lokam and thanks for dropping in your comment ! I apologise for such a late welcome though !

  49. December 10, 2009 10:57 am

    omg!! hilarious.. “whatever” hahahhahahahahhaha .. ok now for the part 2.. hehehhehe @ Mimoh! and Nautankey thinks he looks like you ? hahhahahahah

    • December 10, 2009 10:34 pm

      You didnt live long to read the part 2 or what ??? 😀 😀 😀 and dont listen to nautankey ! crazy guy, he is !!! 😀 😀

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